What happened as a result of the Stamp Act?
The Americans licked the British!
Why did Paul Revere ride his horse from Boston to Lexington?
Because the horse was too heavy to carry!
Why did the British cross the Atlantic?
To get to the other tide!
What do you call a parade of German mercenaries?
A Hessian procession!
What would you get if you crossed a patriot with a small curly-haired dog?
Yankee Poodle!
Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
Yeah, it cracked me up!
What would you get if you crossed George Washington with cattle feed?
The Fodder of Our Country!
What's red, white, blue, and almost as ugly as a dog?
A revolutionary warthog!
What was Thomas Jefferson's favourite dessert?
Monti jello!
Teacher: "Which son of old Virginia wrote the Declaration of Independence?"
Student: "I think it was Thomas Jeffer's son."
What did King George think of the American colonists?
He thought they were revolting!
Why were the early American settlers like ants?
Because they lived in colonies.
What famous pig signed the Declaration of Independence?
John Hamcock!
What did George Washington say to his army at Valley Forge?
"Sorry, men.
The flights to Florida are all booked up!"
What would you get if you crossed the American national bird with Snoopy?
A bald beagle!
What would you get if you crossed a colonial hairpiece with a teepee?
A powdered wigwam!
What's red, white, blue, and green?
A patriotic pickle!
What did the visitor say as he left the Statue of Liberty?
"Keep in torch!"
What's big, cracked, and carries your luggage?
The Liberty Bellhop!
What ghost haunted King George III?
The spirit of '76!
Did you hear about the cartoonist in the Continental Army?
He was a Yankee doodler!
What would you get if you crossed a monster with Yankee Doodle?
Yankee Doofus!
What's red, white, blue and green?
A seasick Uncle Sam!
The Fourth of July weekend was coming up,
and the nursery school teacher took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism.
"We live in a great country," she said.
"One of the things we should be happy is that,
in this country, we are all free."
One little boy came walking up to her from the back of the room.
He stood with his hands on his hips and said. . . .
"I'm not free. I'm four."
Happy 4th everyone!
Hugz, Randa 
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